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Saturday, August 10, 2002


"Performed or Supervised by Trained Professionals" Wednesday, 7/17

The beach today is pretty humdrum, but no big complaints from me. No waves to speak of.

Yup. Nothing going on, as my bro can attest to.

To break through the boredom, my crazy brother and I (this sounds dorky, I realize) pretended to be stuntmen for a movie being shot on the beach: "National Lampoon's Ocean City Vacation," starring Johnny Knoxville (Jordan) and Steve-O (me); Chevy Chase and Randy Quaid have cameos. So we just jumped around like two drunken hooligans, doing some freestyle hardcore stunt work. OK, mostly we acted stupid and tried not to kill ourselves as we crashed through the surf, busting our necks and nearly shattering our spinal columns in the process. You know the drill: don't try this at home, kids. A little tennis after lunch, but I can hardly play, due to my virtual boxing bout last night, as well as the punktastic jackassery from earlier.

Warning! Rampant jackassery about to take place. Stay calm.

Tonight's dinner venue is the Dough Roller on 126th. Their cheese steak sub is not bad at all, if, in accordance with the rest of the menu, on the rather expensive side of things. Especially when you consider the Dough Roller for what it is: basically a slightly classier, more diversified Pizza Hut. But when you're not paying for it, it's all good.

-O.C. Special-

Because today's post was relatively short, I thought I'd make a list of the most ubiquitous chain restaurants and shops in Ocean City. Because everyone loves useless lists.

Sunsations- In the OC-Fenwick area, I counted 9 of these beachwear and -gear department stores. That averages out to about one store per 15 blocks. Some of them are gargantuan, taking up thousands of square feet of extremely pricy ocean-side real estate, which is odd, since there's always another one just a few minutes down the road.

Candy Kitchen- Ahh yes, that marvelous, almost-as-omnipresent-as-Sunsations kiddie magnet that's packed with highly-sweetened confections. We stopped going a few years back, since all you get is generic, bland, vanilla (is that three synonyms in a row?) ice cream topped with a ton of junk. That's what we got, I mean. Your milage may vary. Caution: Candy Kitchen locations contain massive quantities of fudge. Eater discretion advised.

Dough Roller- See notes in today's post. There's gotta be at least 5 or 6 of these. Their specialties are pancakes and pizza, as you might infer from the name.

Thrasher's (Boardwalk) Fries- Are these the same corporate entity?* I'm not sure. Either way, you'll find a potato-frying outlet quite easily in O.C., and it's not hard to find one up in these parts. One complaint everyone has after their first visit: there must be an edict posted somewhere at these places that reads, "Under Penalty of Death,** NO KETCHUP shall be served at any Thrasher's/Boardwalk Fries location!!!" How bizarre is that? They've got vinegar, salt, oils, and Old Bay, but absolutely none of that refined, sweetened tomato paste we've all come to associate with les pommes frites. They must have some beef with Heinz, Inc. or something.

*Apparently not, since Boardwalk Fries has one, but Thrasher's doesn't (but here's a review anyway.) I think Boardwalk is more of a rip-off of Thrasher's and has branched out all over the place, trying to get you to think of Thrasher's from their 'beachy', but that's just my opinion.
**By boiling peanut oil.



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